10 Things I Learned from 007

1. Smoking is cool!

2. It’s okay to hit women

3. Japan is a real country (sort of)

4. All women are either evil, sluts, or both.

5. Evil sluts are awesome, especially if they have rocket launcher motorcycles

6. Stealing nuclear weapons is actually pretty easy.

(Cuz I always sort of thought that would be one of the hardest things in the world)

7. If a chick doesn’t want to do James Bond, she’s a lesbian

(Luckily, this problem can be solved by raping her in a hay barn )

8. Protecting Natalya Sucks

(That bitch can’t shoot worth shit, and it takes her forever to hack that fucking computer)

9. Playing as Odd-Job is Cheap

(Just pick someone else asshole)

10. Roger Moore is Cool

(Cuz I donno, he always seemed kinda like a fag to me)

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2 thoughts on “10 Things I Learned from 007

  1. Very , very funny . I think you can expand the list by another 10 . Like how George Lazenby fucked up one of the best Bond movies in ” On Her majesties secret service ” . also if machine guns are so good why the hell can’t they ever hit anybody ? I wonder how department store dummy Roger Moore got the part as Bond ? maybe he blew cubby brocollie ? ……..How to write a James Bond movie screenplay …… First some megalamanic does something really nasty , then james bond gets called in , then Q gives bond a mulimillion dollar toy that shoots rockets but gets broken any way , then bond humps the good girl and later the bad girl , the villian has a giant retarded freak on his side, then bond gets caught, but he escapes , then he comes back with his posse and they kick ass, the villan’s henchman dies an in an incredible way, the the bad guy escapes and wants revenge on bond, but he gets it in the ass instead , last scene .. bond screws the hot chick as his boss and the royal navy look on . THE END .. ….. best regards kascha kwan , check out my jokes on DailyComedy.com …

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